Prince Andrew – Orwell Would Have Smiled

The recent announcement that Prince Andrew is to ‘retire’ from his ‘job’ as UK Trade Ambassador is an indication that the prince is, perhaps, not quite as dim as he is reputed to be.
Photo by: Bob Chamberlin / Los Angeles Times
Despite his famous lack of intellect, and reputation for doing the most outrageously stupid things (e.g. spraying the throngs of press photographers (and their expensive cameras) with white paint during a visit to Los Angeles in 1984 – See photo), Andrew is most probably smiling contentedly to himself as he contemplates a future that no longer requires him to be involved in anything so irksome as work.

The royal family, bless them, make no pretence at their lack of intellect (Charles excepted—he does pretend), but Andrew must make even Prince Philip scratch his head and say, “Where did that one come from?”. However, ‘Randy Andy’ as he is sometimes fondly referred to in certain newspapers, must have confounded everyone by his spectacular screwing-up of a job that even a cardboard cut-out could have handled successfully. His behaviour can only have been intentional, and now the mentally challenged prince is required to do nothing more demanding than turn up on the first tee at Wentworth at the same time each day. Though that will, no doubt, involve servants and a helicopter in order for him to achieve it.

Despite the opprobrium that the prince has received during his tenure as Trade Ambassador, his seemingly wise strategy of incompetence is quite amusing in its demonstration of how we, the ordinary folk, are manipulated by the powers that be. You see, I don’t imagine for one minute that Andy came up with the strategy himself. No, as always, more devious Machiavellian brains were at work, but I bet that even they were delighted by what is in fact a neat, probably unintentional example of Orwellian doublethink.

The last thing the people running this country want is a bird-brained prince in a position of authority. That’s why they came up with the idea of Trade Ambassador, a role that they thought even Andy would be able to perform without causing offence. The prince’s recent gaffes must have initially horrified those pulling his strings, but the final outcome will, no doubt, have delighted them. The masses have had their demand satisfied for the royals to do a decent days ‘work’, while at the same time the same masses are quite happy that the last thing the royals should be allowed to do is a decent days work. Orwell, I am sure, would have smiled appreciatively.

IR 26/07/11